The Dumbest Thing

So we have been exploring options for when it comes time to place my dad somewhere such as a long term care facility ( also called foster care homes, memory care facilities, and Full time care homes. They don't really refer to them as nursing homes too much anymore even though that's what they are.) We have found one that is literally 4 blocks away from our apartment and offers memory care, which is a housing unit that they live in full time, but instead of things being completely taken care of for them they are encouraged to take care of themselves by doing things like setting and clearing the tables after meals, engaging in games and activities, having chores based on their levels and capabilities. This is where we would like to put my dad as he is only 59 and while he is getting to difficult to keep at home, he is no where close to just sitting around all day. However, when we called to see if his funding would cover this care facility we were told the DUMBEST THING! His funding will not cover the memory care facility because it is hooked onto a long term care facility, but his funding WILL cover a long term care facility. WHAT!? He can't go into the memory care until he is 65, by then he won't need it at the rate his mind is deteriorating! Who do they think needs it more, the older people or the younger people with brain damage?! At this point we can think of no option other than to put him in a long term care facility where he would be left doing nothing but sitting around all day except for the days and times when we would come in and see him. A sure fire fast way for him to go downhill even faster. We haven't made any decisions and don't plan to for awhile, we are still making lots of phone calls, going over people's heads, and banging on doors if we need to. Our conclusion is that there is a huge gap in the care for people with brain damage in the medical field. They simply don't know what to do with these people, how to categorize them, and what benefits if any to award them because their "affliction" is so mysterious and changes so much from day to day. My mom and I can barely keep up with what my dad can and can't do.